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Spoiler! People are Funny.

Truth is stranger than fiction; fiction has to make sense.

This quip, variously attributed to Mark Twain or Leo Rosten, is quite true. In story, writers must pay a great deal of attention to motive and consistency. In real life, people are hilariously inexplicable.

A man in historical Roman-style clothing stands in the foreground with a serious expression; behind him, a group of soldiers in armor and red capes is gathered, with a stone building in the background.

Ben-Hur: Drama, Conflict, and Parody

Cover of "Ben-Hur (Four-Disc Collector's ...
Cover of Ben-Hur (Four-Disc Collector’s Edition)

I love Ben-Hur.

Yes, it’s become somewhat fashionable in recent years for critics to wave their hands disdainfully at the film which was previously held in such esteem. Fine, they can have their pretense of superior taste. And okay, sure, trends in acting have changed in the last half-century. But I still love the film.

No, seriously, I once calculated that I’ve spent maybe half a week or so of my life watching Ben-Hur. Step aside, amateurs.

A dirt path in a forest splits into two directions, forming a fork. Trees and green foliage surround the path.

Decisions, Decisions: Self-Published or Hybrid Author?

crossroads
(Photo credit: Laenulfean)

It’s a great time to be a writer, because we have more choices in how we conduct our careers: traditionally-published, self-published, or a hybridization of both? But with the freedom of choice comes the weight of having to choose.

A framed sign with a red background and white text that reads "FREAK OUT AND THROW STUFF" with a crown symbol above the text.

Achievement Unlocked! Goals Met (And Some I Didn’t Know I Had)

Freak Out
This is how I feel, but in a GOOD way, because I’m so excited. (Photo credit: Frau Shizzle)

A while back I wrote a humorous post about goals which would let me know I’d “made it” (whatever that means) in my writing career. Since then I’ve passed some pretty impressive personal milestones, and while I wrote that post primarily for my fiction writing, it would be wholly ungrateful of me not to acknowledge the great things which have come my way thus far in my non-fiction work as well.

Sometimes we achieve goals we didn’t even mean to set, and it’s good to find the joys of these surprise achievements. So here are some awesome things which have really happened, some of which I hadn’t even thought of as goals until I was delighted by them.

A Sanford King Size permanent marker with a black cap and a cylindrical, striped beige and white body, displayed on a white background.

On Signings – Autograph Woes

English: Sanford King Size Permanent Marker.
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I remember laughing when Patrick Rothfuss confessed to book-signing performance anxiety. (I suspect he’s rather over that by now, by simple necessity.) I hadn’t ever practiced my autograph, either. But I did read Pat’s final word on the subject:

Fired Up, Frantic, and Freaked Out

Book release: Fired Up, Frantic, and Freaked Out!

Fired Up, Frantic, and Freaked Out
Fired Up, Frantic, and Freaked Out: Training Crazy Dogs from Over the Top to Under Control, a clicker training book for reactive, fearful, aggressive dogs

Today’s the day: Fired Up, Frantic, and Freaked Out: Training Crazy Dogs from Over-the-Top to Under Control has hit the shelves!

A woman in a flowing dress and headscarf stands on a rocky ledge, holding a branch. Her clothing billows in the wind as dark clouds gather overhead, with mountains visible in the background.

A Game Not For One Night, But For A Thousand and One Nights….

English: Princess Parizade Bringing Home the S...
Princess Parizade Bringing Home the Singing Tree, 1906, oil on paper (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

My friend Mark gave me a new board game for Christmas. The setting is the world of the traditional 1001 Nights, in which Scheherazade is weaving tales to amuse Shahryar and keep herself alive. Players are story characters, with literally thousands of game paths (very re-playable).

It’s a bit different, as games go, rewarding not just game accomplishments in terms of points or accumulated treasures and things, but extreme storytelling — that is, the more dramatic, tragic, twisted, inspiring, and generally enthralling your character’s journey is, the more likely you’ll win the game.

A word cloud featuring publishing-related terms such as "agent," "copyright," "magazine," and "editor" on a black background, with a circular illustrated face in the top right corner.

What’s It Like, Being a Writer?

What’s it like being a writer, you ask? Well, there’s several different aspects to it all, of course. Here’s a quick glimpse into a writer’s head. Watch your step….

That guy's brain is a bag full of cats. You can smell crazy on him.

A female elf character with blue hair, wearing armor and holding a sword and shield, stands on a sandy path in a fantasy village setting.

Embarrassing True Story

Good thing my bikini is made of chain mail... ...
Good thing my bikini is made of chain mail… no really.. (Photo credit: Crys)

I wrote a parody short story. It was a parody of high fantasy, meant to play on tropes and cliches and the sheer over-the-top ridiculousness of itself. It probably wasn’t very good, but there it was. It had sword fights, chain mail bikinis, haunted swamps, chases on horseback, the works. I worked hard on my protagonist’s name — it needed to be feminine and sexy, yet exotic and barbaric, and utterly unsubtle….

Alura. Oh, perfect. Alura.