I Am Being Hunted

Yesterday I stepped out through my front door with the dogs, and I walked face-first into a huge spiderweb spread across the frame of the door itself.

I clawed the web from my face and hair, and I turned back to see the spider crawling up to the refuge of the doorjamb. It was a large spider, at least an inch long, so certainly old enough to know that the door, used multiple times a day, isn’t a great spot to put a web. But hey, everyone makes a mistake, I guess.

I went back inside shortly and spent most of the day working at home. I got a lot done, very productive, yay me! 

In the evening, I finally decided to leave the house, and I walked out to my car in the detached garage. And between my car and the garage wall, right where I walk every day, was another new, huge web.

large spiderweb stretching between red car and wall

Guys, I really don’t know any other way to take this, than that the spiders whom I have always protected here have suddenly turned on me. Who has been spreading rumors among them? Who has fed them lies in place of flies?

Look here, arachnids: I got no beef with you (other than the tick family, with which I have a feud of extreme prejudice). I actually really appreciate your efficiency in dealing with many more annoying insects. Please stop with the human-sized webs built overnight in my more regular and predictable traffic pattern. If you really need someone for the Centennial Sacrifice, just let me know, and I’ll see if I can get that would-be burglar who pretended to be a gas meter reader back.

One Need Not Be A Chamber To Be Haunted

I encountered this poem while looking for something else entirely a few months ago and I’ve just been waiting for an excuse to use it. No such excuse has conveniently arisen. So, I am just going to share it here.

Part Four: Time and Eternity

One need not be a chamber to be haunted,
One need not be a house;
The brain has corridors surpassing
Material place.

Continue reading

When the Midwesterner Met the Canadian

red car hood in front of dirt road lined by trees and then grass

Take the side road, they said. It will be scenic, they said. Okay, it IS scenic, and it’s in pretty good shape for a dirt road.

I took the back road out of Calgary, Alberta (where I was for When Words Collide) by recommendation for a more scenic route, as if you’ve seen Alberta Highway 2 once, you’ve really seen all there is to see. My route took me pretty far west into distinctly rural territory. As I was driving further and further from civilization and my streaming radio failed, I mused that I’d better not flatten a tire or anything, as I didn’t know if I’d be able to reach help.

Just a moment later, I came around a turn and saw a car sitting only partly off the road, and occupied. I passed, stopped, and reversed to pull alongside, putting down my passenger window so I could call to the driver. Continue reading